The way I see it

Hey guys, how was your week? I hope it was good! I didn’t post last week because it was father’s day and I just decided to chill with the family.


So today, I stumbled across a documentary ‘Protecting our Foster kids’ on BBC iPlayer. To say I found it a bit emotional was an understatement.


For as long as I can remember, definitely during my teenage years I’ve always wanted to adopt when I’m older and watching the documentary further cemented that desire.


One thing I learnt was the clear distinction between fostering and adoption. Fostering may be short or long term and does not necessarily culminate into adoption. It has its positives and negatives as with all things in life.


The one I saw was where a teenager was being adopted. I’m sure we can all say that we certainly weren’t angels during that time. I definitely wasn’t. Mood swings, attitude and the like plus feeling like you know it all. This is standard but then imagine a person who already has not had a permanent home and is constantly moved. This could further exacerbate the way they behave.  Eventually the foster parents decided that they didn’t want to continue fostering her as she was a bit difficult.


I was saddened a little annoyed watching this. I think it was more to do with when the foster dad said things such as “When fostering is starting to affect my family and my business negatively well I just have to take a step back and rethink”. I don’t know about you but it came across as a little cold. What made it worse for me was the fact that the things the teenager did, if they were her actual parents they wouldn’t kick her out for it. But then that’s how it works right? Things that they will tolerate from their own kids won’t be accepted by foster kids which in my humble opinion is wrong.


It made me all the more grateful for the fact that I have parents and I’ve grown up in a loving household. Nobody chooses their parents and nobody chooses the circumstances that they are met with upon arrival on this earth. Our upbringing shapes us somewhat no matter how many times many of us try to deny it. Imagine being passed around different households. I’m aware that this isn’t the experience for those in foster care.


Adoption and foster care isn’t for everyone and one shouldn’t enter into it lightheartedly.


Family is the bedrock of society and I hope that when the time comes I do motherhood justice.